The forces that change us

I have often thought about the many opportunities that face each of us as we sift through our lives. So many things of unimportance seem to weigh in on who we are and what we become. I look around and see both good and evil for what it is. Sadly, I find my eyes fixed upon the calamities of the world using myself as the catalyst of judgment. If we become what enters in through our eyes, maybe I should be more aware of what my eyes are fixed upon. I don't really care what people say about me. I'm sure it's diverse, but surprisingly I don't think I would be shocked by it's contents. That doesn't go without saying that there would be a positive side, and being me I would more than likely push those things to the side and try to figure out the reasons behind the negative. Once again I fixated on what others would have seen while they themselves have disregarded the positive attributes that I myself have neglected. Am I really siding with the opposing team? I don't even want to start thinking about what that says for my self esteem. Maybe this is the biggest calamity of them all! A deadened sense of self worth and what's even worse is that I'm aware of it. A necessary change is required, a paradigm shift. That is the change, but where is the force? Could an increased amount of love for ones self be enough to cause us to look beyond the stormy skies of today and help us to bask in the sunny tomorrows of our lives? Maybe...

What A real American stands for.

I'm pretty sure Universal Health care is by far the dumbest thing I've ever heard of. Let have some fun. Columbus. 1492.. Jamestown. First American Colony 1607. Mayflower 1620. American Independence 1783 (war ended in 1776) So, in 226 years of Freedom we have created a country greater than any other. Yet we in our ignorance seem to think that taking advise from the rest of the Industrial world on things such as Health Care and Gun Control is wise. America was founded on freedom which pushed it ahead of the rest of the world in almost every aspect. Those who think we should take a stand back and let America become a follow rather than a leader should be ashamed to call themselves Americans.

Engage brain before speaking.

I'm am blown away at how mindless people can be. The following quote comes from a comment on a CNN story about Mitt Romney. "Romney's lack of leadership skill and his powerless inaction and unwillingness to take on Limbaugh, FOX News, et. al., speaks volumes." Are you serious Lynda from Minnesota? A statement like this couldn't be any further from the truth. He has proven time and time again that he is a leader. People, do me a favor. Stop shooting off at the mouth until you have your facts straight and can back up what you say with your own set of credentials. Until I see you draw a crowd of thousands to your next political speech, your "Expert advise" in my book is a load of garbage and isn't worth it's weight in dog droppings. You might not like him, but don't discredit facts because of your hate. I would think twice before I let my personal bias show my personal stupidity. And P.S. Lynda. I've seen him on Fox news more than a few times. Case in point.

Source: http://politicalticker.blogs.cnn.com/2009/09/16/romney-plans-busy-weekend-in-washington-area/

I love Brock! He is the MAN! Everyone was Booing him and in my opinion he didn't deserve it. He was in front of a Frank Mir hometown crowd. Brock didn't do anything Mir didn't except for win (Perhaps a huge understatement) They both talked a lot of trash and for some reason they are making him out to be a "villain" and bad for the sport. He is an intense fighter and trained hard to win this fight. And this is also putting Dana White in the drivers seat to sign Fedor to the UFC. So how is Brock Lesnar's Win and Demeanor hurting the sport if it is in fact drawing better quality fighters to the UFC that in return will make for bigger and more exciting fights which us the fans should welcome whole heartily. Keep it up Brock. Keep running your mouth and don't shut it till they can find someone that can MAKE YOU.

I awoke from a dream, confused by the way it felt so real. It was as though my thoughts had been carried away to an unfamiliar room, my eyes embraced your image as a hawk to its prey, I find myself nervous as you reach out, closing the gap between us. I can feel your lips press against mine. I close my eyes in bliss only to open them in disappointment as the awful truth of loneliness gently wakes me.

The man who could not speak

I have a hard time just writing down my thoughts. I would rather wait until I feel as though I have something deeply profound to say.

Although I feel like there are so many things I want to achieve I find it hard to be motivated.
Yesterday I had the experience to put aside the time I waste on meaningful nothingness and attempted to challenge myself to make a difference in the life of someone else. As me and a friend walked up to the doorway I could see the small family of three getting ready to eat as they gathered around the kitchen table. They must have heard us walking up the wheelchair ramp from the way I saw her staring our the window in the door from her chair. I had meet her the day before and was able to get a little insight on her situation and the situation of the young man I was there to see. She had a very warm smile and offered me food, she was from Brazil and had married a man who had lost his wife a few years back, if that wasn't enough he himself had suffered from a stroke that paralyzed the right side of his body and left him slow in speech.

As this young man opened the door he invited us in and she again offered me and my friend Ryan food once again. We respectfully declined and asked if we could take a seat on the couch and spend a few minutes with the young man. She smiled and said "right after we pray" Then she asked who would offer the blessing on the food. To my surprise the paralyzed man who had at first appearance seemed unable, spoke up and said "I will" As I was standing there in this humble home I could hear a man who could not really speak pray to his Father in Heaven, more specifically I heard him pray for good, He said it multiple times, asking that good things would happen and that good would be felt in their home. I add my amen to that prayer and sat down from the young man and let him know that I was there to get to know him and to be his friend.
I offered him a position on the upcoming weeks softball game that agreed to fill. Tomorrow I will pick him up and bring him to the game. I know I will be offered food as I do so, so I might just show up hungry.

In conclusion, I was able to walk away from myself and was able to witness the love of God in the lives of those who seek him out no matter what has happened. What a lesson. To hear a man who can barley speak pray for good, it makes me wonder why a man that speaks to much can find it so hard to open his mouth.

God be with you till we meet again.

As I find myself sitting here, thinking about the great trials we are faced with in this life, I realize what it means to really love someone. Today I received a phone call from my father letting me know that his mother had passed away early this morning. I couldn't help but replay the memories that I had of her in my head. One in particular has been playing in my head as a constant loop. I had gone out to California to visit with some friends but took the trip down to my Grandparents home and surprised them by knocking on their door. As she opened the door she began to cry and she hugged me and wouldn't let go. I think of how much she loved me and I will never be able to remove the image of that smile or the warmth I felt from my heart and mind. How brave we are to face the storms of life. We need to remember that in times when pain enters our hearts we can turn to our savior to calm our turbulent seas. I have had the following scripture enter into my heart today and find promise and truth in its message. For as in Adam all die, even so in Christ shall all be made alive. I know that I will see her again someday, until then. I will miss her but at least her love had a lasting impression on me that I will never forget.